I woke up this morning confused again. I’m confused about who I am, how I got where I am, and I’m unsure where I’m going. I look in the mirror and I don't recognize myself. I listen to my thoughts and they don't sound like me. It isn't that I don't like the woman that I see and hear now, she just isn't familiar.
When did I become half of a whole?
When did I start speaking in first person plural, "We'd love to" and "We have plans that night"?
When did I grow roots? And not just roots but roots in the SOUTH?
Since when do I care if I’m carrying my part of the household responsibilities?
When did I start looking forward to quiet nights at home? … several nights a week?
When did I stop thinking relatively and embrace absolute truths?
And why did voting nearly rip me in two?
It's awfully scary when you don't recognize yourself. It's confusing when you double take after every decision and statement you make. Talk about a difficult way to live. I surprise myself on a daily basis, and that gets pretty uncomfortable after awhile.
1 comment:
Just wait till the best thing about wakeing up on Saturday morning is realizing you are up early enough to have breakfast and still get a nap before noon. (and being genuinely exicited about it) THEN you really start thinging WTF happen to me.
Or...raising another human being, and everything you do or say is going to shape them and their thoughts, talk about doing a double take after every decision and statement you make.
And then, when you are SOOO comfortable with everything you do and say, you are bored with yourself, and everything around you. Take every day, slow and enjoy the uncomfortable feel it gives you. You my dear, have a long way to go. :o)
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