Thankful Thursday/ episode 16

what a week. what a roller coaster. between allergies that left me feeling like i'd been hit by a truck and an already fragile mental state i wasn't really prepared for all that came screaming at me over the past few days.

i had to wrestle with a couple pretty substantial work dramas (that you don't want to hear about). my mom had a crazy health scare where the "c" word was thrown around. and my close friend had a miscarriage. and all of it fell in my lap over 24 hours. none of the stressers were impacting me directly, but all are hitting entirely too close to home. none of the stressers were problems i could control or "fix", but all demanded a solution or relief. i was forced to sit by and trust my heavenly father.

turns out, my mother is recovering from surgery and there is no cancer in the picture. i've done what i can to sort out parts of the work stuff. and my friend is surrounded by her parents and her husband to grieve a loss that i can't imagine.

episode 16: "today i am thankful...for my faith"

things could be so much worse (which i don't want to imagine or experience by the way). if that sounds flippant or nonchalant, i don't mean it to be. i find myself acutely aware that God DOES sometimes give us more than we can handle. but He does it knowing that He doesn't give us more than He can handle. when the crap hits the fan we can lean on Him. my main problem is that i don't. i try to control and fix and handle it all by myself. i leave Him out of the stress. and the burdens get way too heavy. when will i learn? despite all the craziness that surrounds me (like my mother and my dear friend in surgery at the SAME exact moment) i can find rest knowing there is STILL a God in heaven. He's still in control. and he's working ALL things for good for those who love him. even when our circumstances seem dire or unexplainable. faith is an amazing gift that gives meaning to what might otherwise feel chaotic and random. my faith gives me rest.

so today, i am thankful.